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social awareness

No Doubt

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Who do you doubt?

Who do you give the benefit of the doubt?

What does that mean, “Give the benefit of the doubt?”

Just yesterday I was in line at my grocery store and there appeared to be an adult male in front of me checking out also. However, he was texting and the clerk asked multiple times for him to pay as he fingered his device. He didn’t know if he needed a bag. He couldn’t work the card machine without the clerks help.

I made a mistake giving him the benefit of the doubt that he was an adult.

Doubt giving is linked to trust.

Who do you trust?

We say to ourselves, “I believe that person is like me. They think like me, they feel like me, they understand like me.” However, should we do that in every way? Should we proverbially “bend over backwards,” in all situations, in all circumstances?

Some businesses now have a motto on how to deal with customers. “Benefit of intent.” Assume that the customer has no ill intent when dealing with them and their concerns. 

Are we to turn a blind eye to intent?

When do we take action when we realize we are being used?

Is there a collective loss of memory that there are bad people in the world doing bad things because that’s their plan?

The Sociopath Next Door by Martha Stout, PH.D. examines the fact that 1 in 25 Americans secretly have no conscience and can do anything without feeling guilty.

Sociopaths can be your mother, father, sister, brother, uncle, aunt, nephew, niece, grandmother, grandfather, friend, nun, acquaintance, boss, manager, HR person, next-door-neighbor, priest, clerk, charity fundraiser, mail person, reverend, bus driver, celebrity, producer, executive, CEO, senator, congress person, POTUS.

Anyone in your life…

They are the reason why shit happens in the world. The good hearted people, the people with morality are taken advantage of by the sociopath because we collectively believe that everyone is like us. That everyone has morality just like ours.

They don’t!

The sociopath thrives on our collective ignorance of their existence. It’s not as if they don’t know the difference between good and bad. The simple truth is they don’t care. They don’t care who or what they use or destroy as long as they benefit.

Maybe it is time to think about the problems that surround us all and why or who is at the heart of why they don’t get any better.

Doubt and trust should only be reserved for those who are human.

Those without empathy are defined as monsters.

No doubt.

Peace

DFrey

 

Forces Film, Again Begin

Who That

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“Who is in the kitchen cooking my Chinese dinner?”

“Is it a Mexican?”

“Where is that guy from?” 

“He looks like an Armenian. They are bad people.”

“Look at the lips on that one would you.”

“You know who is responsible for all the shit that’s going on?  They’re the reason we can’t have a good country.”

These are the words I heard from a man who is from the greatest generation. He and just about every member of that generation define everything, everyone, every event with race.

I’m standing beside a pool in Ocala, Florida with the residents of the retirement community. The chit chat includes why you can’t go into town at night, the Coons. Why you can’t go across the tracks, the Cubans. Why it’s only safe to get a haircut in a particular shop because they don’t cut niggers hair.

All of these people attend the local Baptist church. They pray to God at every meal. Cry and lift each other up as they die. Bring hot casseroles and pies to those left behind.

Yet behind the church is the Black church. Right there on the main road into Ocala.

The black is not welcomed into the white church in the black churches front yard.

Oh, they help the black church the white church does. They collect up the used Sunday school workbooks and give them to the black church. There’s nothing like a work book all ready filled out about Jesus to tell you how much he and the white parishioners love you.

Racism?

You’re not going to change these people. Each one of them will cling to their prejudice with their last Medicare assisted breath. They’ve learned at the knee of our past racist American forefathers the meaning of, “Everything has its place and a place for everything.”

To allow anything out of place is a sin against Gods word.

“You going to hell boy if help them coloreds!” From the lips of the church deacon.

Now, we have the Baby Boomers, the children of the greatest generation. How are they doing on that racism, bigotry thing they surely fed from as children?

Our current president is one of them.

The GOP is dominated by them.

The House and the Senate leadership is well manned by them.

Do you see anything?

Can you hear anything?

Do you feel it?

Peace

DFrey

 

Forces Film, Again Begin

Assumptions

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That’s a strange word isn’t it?

The old joke about assumptions goes like this… 

If you assume you know something you, have the potential of making an ass out of you and me.

In the world of Catholicism, this coming August 15, it is the annual religious holiday celebrating the belief that Mary, the earthly mother of Jesus the Christ, was taken up into heaven. 

A point of procedure here: Many within that faith do not realize that Mary, the mother of Jesus, was taken bodily into heaven just like her son. There are no bones of Mary in a reliquary in Italy or any other principal monarchy in Europe.

Assuming what’s good for the gander is good for the goose, theology-based reasoning don’t you see.

Assumptions.

Back in the later 1930s there were a group of leaders who were talking to this Hitler guy. This Hitler guy and his friends had won a big election and pushed out the old governing folks in their capital of Berlin, Germany.

The prime minister of England at the time, Neville Chamberlain, found himself faced with a problem. England like the rest of the world was recovering from the great depression. Unlike Hitler and his crew who grew their economy, built freeways, brought jobs back, blamed all their problems on immigrants. England was still in the dumps.

So when Hitler began acquiring other countries, Chamberlain didn’t want to get involved with all that silliness on the continent. He didn’t want to spend any of his political capital. He believed it was best to compromise. He appeased Hitler. 

He assumed Hitler was a nice guy and would keep his word. Of course anyone who would assassinate his opposition, roll tanks into his neighbors front yards like Hitler could be trusted, right?

Chamberlain assumed wrongly.

Back long ago at the beginning of 2017, the people of the US got a new executive leader, president Trump. A lot of people assumed he was going to bring back historically lost manufacturing jobs. Prevent drug abuse. Build a wall to keep white people safe. Get all the health care they need and not have to pay for it. Stop brown people from getting everything for free.

The president has assumed he can call the intelligence community, “…A bunch of Hitlers!”

Without retort.

He’s assumed he can call the free press, “…Fake news!”

Without retort.

Just the other day when president Trump was asked about the 750 plus State Department workers thrown out of the Moscow Embassy by Putin he said, “He appreciated the favor done him and the American people by reducing the US budget!”

Trump assumed we are not as intelligent as he and the quips of a snarky bully go over our heads.

Who really is the ass?

Peace

DFrey

Forces Film, Again Begin

Where is the Hero

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The boy stands on the corner of the street. His mind races, not letting in the questions that pummel him from the bystanders. At his feet lays his father.

Is he drunk?

Are you lost?

Who is that old man?

Look at that piece of shit.

The boy can't cry out. His mind caught by jagged thoughts. Thoughts that back him into a choking, dark corner. 

As all of time comes to a stop.. 

A hand reaches past the boy and checks for a pulse on the neck of the fallen guardian.

The same hands flex, move the body into position, force life back into the tired heart.

Who are the strong?

Where is compassion?

The heart knows what the mind cannot conceive.

The hero does what is needed.

The answer to all of our problems lies within the grasp of the hero that is in each of us.

Not born of radiation.

Not created by gods.

Not given birth by a miracle of DNA.

We all know what is the right thing to do. What prevents us from moving forward is the familiarity of our own doleful ignorance to accepting that the everything changes. Nothing stays the same.

We either accept that or we find ourselves at odds with our fellow participants in life. We constantly are at odds with the news, with people in line, in traffic, at the store, at the DMV, at places of worship, at places of amusement, fellow diners. The list is as endless as living itself.

We can make the promises of heaven here and now.

We, the hero, accept the call of the future to, “do”.

Peace

DFrey

Forces Film, Again Begin

Deny

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“I remember” is an unusual thing for me to say.

When I was seventeen I died.

I lost the memories of my life. Of my family.

What remained was burnt, tattered, unrecognizable as my own life.

What I have are recollections of memories that I do not feel are my own.

I sometimes wonder where I get the sense of caring that I have and where it came from.

Is it my own in combination with a mentor?

A story..

My grandfather Larkin was a retired Quaker minister who lived with us. I assume he had some kind of retirement but it must have been very little.

I remember sitting on his lap and he asked what I would like for Christmas. We were a working-class family in Cleveland, Ohio with a father who didn’t think children needed toys.

I responded to my grandfather that I would like a Hot Wheel car. “Is that all," he asked?

Under the tree not only did I get a Hot Wheel but I also got the loop the loop track.

Another story..

Millions of people recently got healthcare for the first time in their lives. Some men helped them get it. Then some men got angry because they did.

One man in the middle of the night stood up and with a simple “no”, did not allow his political party to commit suicide. Senator John McCain. He prevented other men from denying care to others not like them.

Last story..

A man stood before a throng of people and told a story how people busy with their lives passed by a fallen and ill man on their street. Only one person stopped to help. A person whom the important believed to be an unworthy welfare cheat.

That unworthy welfare cheat nursed the fallen back to health, restoring his faith in humanity.

Why do we believe we have the right to deny health to others not like us?

Peace

DFrey

For more about our current state of politics read GOP Angst.

Forces Film, Again Begin

Where Has Shame Gone?

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Remember when your mother would give you, the look?

That time when you got the speeding ticket and the officer said to you, “Do you know how fast you were going?”

How about last week when you remembered you didn’t send a birthday card to your sister?

That feeling you felt, we have all felt, is called shame.

You feel bad when you do something or in many cases don’t do something that you know hurts another person.

Humans with any empathy feel that sense that they have committed a wrong and do their best to make it better.

At minimum they ask for forgiveness.

What happens when you have a person who has no sense of shame?

Do you know what that is called? Someone without empathy? 

They come to your table with an extra name tag. It says in fine print, Sociopath.

There are degrees to a lot things in life and one of those are people who don’t work well with others. There are degrees of sociopathy. Most know of the extreme cases but they live next door to us all.

That guy who yells at the kids when a ball lands in his yard.

That woman who won’t take “No” when she’s selling raffle tickets.

The current resident of the White House.

Open corruption.

What do you do when the president has no shame?

Do our laws address such a challenge?

What do we do as citizens of the country when our president has no shame?

I’m asking?

Peace

DFrey

 

Forces Film, Again Begin

GOP Angst

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Premise: The GOP needs to become responsible adults, tough love, and stop supporting their crazy ass children who don’t want to work and live off their parents success.

Call it what you will, but what is needed is either some tough love or a civil war within the GOP. 

The adults of the party need to stop supporting the radical nihilists that have taken control. The do nothings who are happy to ride in their Cadillac’s on the way to the GOP bank for their no interest rate loans on the American future.

Why do they want a job in government at both the state and federal levels and want to do absolutely nothing? If they were in their parents basements they would be thrown out on their ear long ago for being welfare cheats. Lazy, un-christian work ethic, soaking up the white mans prosperity, low expectation, illegitimate bastards.

In their blood pressure, lower cholesterol, mind warped brains, they want everything for their constituents but nothing for anyone else’s constituents. It doesn’t make any sense unless they are children. Angst ridden teenagers who are angry at the world because it’s not the way they thought it should be.

There’s a clue.

They thought the world should be the way they wanted it to be. To serve only themselves. That is the definition of a child. Children do not have a larger sense of the world outside of their own interests. The word is called being selfish. 

To wit, a certain Israeli man once said that it was a sure sign you were on the road to damnation.

It’s up to the parents to teach their children not to be selfish. It’s what’s known as a value. It’s called a value because if we are trying to have a society, we want what’s best for all of us. 

All of us!

The whole reason why we have a representational government is so that the many can elect a few to represent us and do our business. To work for all of us.

If you are in government and think only of your own interests, you either need to church yourself up as to the tenants of your office or you need to resign and move back into your parents basement.

That is if your actions haven’t all ready made your parents go bankrupt and they died in poverty because they couldn’t afford the medicine and care they needed.

So your family home was taken back by the bank long ago and you have no place to go but to some hookah hang out to bitch about how bad the world is for you, a legislator in the U.S.

Nobody understands how bad you have it. Nobody understands your feelings of what’s best for you is best for the country.

Take it or leave it but here’s some advice from a parent in the past.

Think not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country.

Peace

DFrey

 

Forces Film, Again Begin

Where Is Love?

where is love, Daniel J Frey, Forces Film

Oliver Twist in the musical Oliver laments and prays about the whereabouts of love while he’s locked in the basement of a funeral parlor where he’s an indentured servant. This scene is no allegory. There are no hidden meanings here. He’s trapped in a dark world where the light of love refuses to shine for him.

I want to ask the same question, where is love?

A lot of us think we know what it means. We believe we have it, want it, are able to express it, know when it’s being expressed towards us. But knowing the definition doesn’t mean we can actually do it. I know the definition of a pole-vaulter but if I attempted an even modest leap my lack of understanding of its definition would result in a spectacular YouTube worthy fail.

Love is an ideal that many attempt but few will be able to stick the landing. However, you can find a few gold medal winners Jesus, Buddha, Gandhi, Lao Tzu…

Hey, also include that person who was done a terrible wrong but still looked through the lens of love and saw past the deed and understood the heart and still returned love without blame to you. There are faithful holders of the ideal sprinkled amongst all of us.

Love is the hardest emotion to understand with the intellect, it defies logic because it’s the language of the soul, the song of the heart. We're all tone deaf it appears in this world of ours to it's melody and lyric. Like Oliver we’re all locked in a dark world that mistreats us, batters our souls, misshapes our perceptions, ignites anger, walls in hate, whispers lies telling us we’re misunderstood, alone, unwanted.

Be the answer to Oliver’s prayer. Act with love. Do it today.

DFrey

Peace.

Forces Film, Again Begin

Going Home

west 25, Cleveland, Ohio, Daniel J Frey, Forces Film

It begins as a plan, then excitement mounts, all those activities that made you who you are relished and polished and placed on a shelf of honor are now dusted off for reexamination.

Wah Fu, Middleburgh Heights, Ohio, Daniel J Frey, Forces Film

Flying is like a dream it’s time travel. You leave the familiar and join others in a streak across time and space.  You wearily awaken in a world once familiar but now everything seems slightly wrong. The trees are too big or just plain missing. Buildings are abandoned where you once waited in enormous throngs to see Star Wars.

Randall Park Mall, Cleveland, Ohio, Daniel J Frey, Forces Film

The place where you had your first job, your first drink, your first love is demolished wiped away by local politics and the fear of gluten.

McDonald's, Solon, Ohio, Daniel J Frey, Forces Film

But the people you cherish are still there. They are trapped in a loving embrace of time and place. Like kindly spirits they tell you of tales and adventures you once had together. Their recollections stained with regret that you left.

Jeff, Daniel J Frey, Forces Film

The city that I sprung from will be there just like my shadow reminding me that our past sets our feet upon a future we can not see it’s end. 

Shadow, Daniel J Frey, Forces Film

Forces Film, Again Begin