Time

Not enough.

Too much when you are young.

Too little when you have built regret.

What’s a good use of time?

Being busy.

Being busy with what?

That’s the question all of our lives ask.

What are we doing here?

It’s easier to see what others are doing with their time.

It’s easy to critique.

My time spent is better than your time spent.

Spending time is the illusion that time is a commodity.

A currency.

Something that can be earned.

Something borrowed.

Something spent.

I take time away from the unimportant to spend on what I want more of.

I want more time.

Time to relax.

To sleep.

To dream.

Time to run.

To sing.

To laugh.

Time to get what I don’t have.

Love.

Time.

Not enough.

Too much when you are young.

Too little when you’re trapped inside your regret.

Time to run.

Time to sing.

Time to laugh.

Not enough.

Peace.

Daniel J Frey aka Toby

Out of Control

Why haven't you written as much lately?

My writing has slowed due to drawing a graphic novel entitled Highway.

Since there is only one of me, I've been concentrating on that to get it done as soon as possible.

One holiday after another, a birthday party, an urgent sizzle reel, and a broken-down car all hamper the graphic novels' advancement.

Just like you, we can't control everything in our lives.

Life gets in the way of our plans.

How far does your control extend?

What are the boundaries of what you believe you are in control of?

A person should know their limits.

Although some of us appear to ignore them.

Like, I can't control my family.

My 30-something children stopped listening to me when they realized I was human like them.

My wife doesn't listen to me.

But that's the secret to a good marriage.

Don't listen too closely if you want to stay married.

My friends sort of listen to me while I'm with them, but as soon as I leave, I know they are doing what they want to do.

As for strangers…

I'm asked at Disneyland a lot where the restrooms are…

That's because I wear all black and a sports jacket, which makes me look like security.

How far does your control extend?

I don't even listen to myself.

I tell myself I'm going to do this or that, and I generally do, but not on the schedule I thought I would.

Some of us just don't realize we control nothing.

We've built up elaborate stories telling ourselves we are in control and that everyone should think and behave just like us.

Why?

Because we're right and they're wrong.

Fascinating, isn't it?

They believe they are right and you are wrong.

Yet the history of truth is on our side.

When the false curtain of control is lifted, time reveals the truth.

Our beliefs form the foundation of a compassionate and loving human society.

Like when we believe that racism is wrong.

When we believe that fascism is wrong.

When we believe that power for the sake of power is wrong.

We believe in justice.

We believe in freedom.

We believe in the brotherhood of mankind.

These things, these truths, are in our control.

We can exercise these truths, take control, or we can let them go.

I hear my wife calling me…

Love and peace to you.

Daniel J Frey aka Toby

Precious Ignorance

When a person is willing to ignore the truth and accept fiction, they are afraid of the truth.

They will not respond to facts because they will have to face what keeps them trapped; they are more afraid of it than being wrong.

One of the craziest things the White race has persuaded itself to be true is that it is the majority.

At no time ever on this planet did the White race constitute the majority population.

The White race has always been a minority.

Both in terms of population and race.

The reason behind the myth of their dominance, both mentally and in population size, is rooted in fear.

Fear of the unknown.

"There be monsters here," at the edges of their maps.

Not rainbows and flowers or peace.

Monsters.

To the White European explorers, everyone they met was an animal…

No soul…

Not human.

Although the people they found were good enough to take their wealth and have sex with, they could not sit at the same table with them for a meal.

They were worthy of God's pity but not of the White race.

They were to be pitied, the non-white races.

That's what purgatory was for.

That's where God makes the decision to either allow them into 2nd class heaven or send them straight to hell.

Redemption for the non-white races...

All the non-white races would be told the truth of the son of God dying for them; they would be baptized, told wealth was a sin, their gold, silver, and jewels taken, and then these people would be executed, after which God would sort them out, each to their own worth.

Ignorance.

Precious ignorance.

It's a terrible thing, always living in fear.

It will make you paranoid.

But fear is a wall that you can hide behind.

It gives protection.

Comfort.

You don't have to participate.

Fear means you don't have to deal with those people on the other side of your wall.

You don't have to hear their cry.

You don't have to see their pain.

You don't have to feel.

Staying ignorant of what this world is all about is what humans do.

This is not a new story.

It repeats over and over.

The story is more important than the truth.

We all share the same boat in this world, but some passengers believe they have a golden ticket because of their race.

There is a lifeboat for them.

The rest of us in steerage will find it tough when the ship goes down.

Damn.

Damn us for not believing and recognizing that the White race is to rule the world.

That's what Trump represents.

The last great White hope for them.

Appointed by God…

Not making that up, people.

Please take a look at what his supporters are saying to each other on social media.

He'll make America great again because he will make it "White again."

They believe the myth he peddles.

The truth is that's not going to happen.

When the first White European explorer set out to discover what lay beyond the White map's borders, it marked the beginning of the world's unification.

As the centuries passed, borders merged, and languages consolidated.

In the future, humanity will be one.

One language.

One people.

The bell of Freedom rings, calling for the past to retire and heralding the future's entrance.

The only monster left on the map's border is ignorance.

I write this as an invitation to gather together to walk boldly into that light of truth where all are equal.

If you can walk around your wall…

Let it go and be hope.

Peace

Daniel J Frey aka Toby

Meeting Disney

Dreams can come true.

But, almost always in unexpected ways.

As far back as I can remember, through my broken memory, I have been an artist.

Drawing, drawing, drawing.

As a child, my grandfather gave me shelf-paper to draw on.

I would draw the characters I loved from Saturday morning TV and hang these drawings on my bedroom wall.

Each Sunday evening in the 1960s, there were two TV shows on back-to-back in Cleveland, Ohio, on good old Channel 3, NBC.

First, there was Lassie.

The second is The Wonderful World of Color, hosted by Walt Disney.

As a child, I dreamed of working for Walt.

I'm wondering why it was a driving force to make that happen.

Time.

Time would take me on a journey to be the best artist I could be.

After getting married, having two children, and becoming a stay-at-home dad, I returned to school and earned my degree in art and physics.

Fate.

I came so close, but fate would wash away my lifelong dream.

Other people made decisions that led to the end of 2D animation at Disney, leaving many artists out in the cold.

My dream was shattered.

A lot of crying in the shower.

Eventually, I pieced together the idea of pursuing a career in the entertainment industry, specifically in Hollywood.

It was there that I met an actor, a part-time world-class magician named Steve Valentine.

We became friends, worked together, ate together, laughed, and cried.

Steve would have get-togethers with many of the people he came into contact with.

At one early get-together I attended, I was standing and talking with two older gentlemen.

We talked about this and that, and I asked What do you do?

They both said they were musicians.

"You either love us or hate us."

I said What have you composed?

Richard said, "It's a Small World."

What?

Did you say Small World?

"You either love us or hate us."

I laughed and said Are you crazy?

Really!

You are loved!

You are loved!

You are Gods of music, I told them.

The two gentlemen were Richard and Robert Sherman.

They composed all the music we associate with Disney.

Chim Chim Cher-ee, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Feed the Birds, Heffalumps and Woozles, I Wanna Be Like You, Jolly Holiday, Let's Go Fly A Kite, Little Black Rain Cloud, The Parent Trap, The Rain Rain Rain Came Down Down Down, A Spoonful of Sugar, Step In Time, Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, There's A Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow, The Tiki Tiki Tiki Room, Winnie the Pooh, just to name the tip of the iceberg of their music.

This meeting wasn't just once or twice, but over many years; we would stand and sit together at Steve's parties, share stories with each other, and eat cake.

We sat down and ate cake together.

Laughing.

Today...

Today, as I walked down Main Street at Disneyland...

I stopped by their window dedicated to the Sherman Brothers at the Music Shop.

I thought about my dream of working for Disney…

Tears came down...

I shook the hands that shook the hand of Walt.

I looked into the eyes that looked at Walt.

I laughed and ate cake with the brothers, who laughed and ate cake with Walt.

I was struck…

The universe...

The universe has a strange way of making dreams come true.

Peace.

Daniel J Frey aka Toby

Stop Talking

Observation…

Why is it that our conservative brothers and sisters feel the need to tell us who they are constantly?

Telling us even if we already know…

Conservatives can't stop telling us...

They love America.

They are Christian.

They are heterosexual.

They are pro-second Amendment.

They are pro-life.

They are pro-billionaire.

They are pro-Putin.

They are pro-MAGA.

They are pro-Trump.

They are anti-immigrant.

They are anti-Islamic.

They are anti-brown people.

They are anti-gay.

They are anti-green.

They are anti-science

They are anti-free speech.

They are anti-Democrat.

Conservatives.

I grew up in and around a very conservative, far-right Christian family and friends, and I have first-hand experience being told over and over again, as if I'm an idiot, their ideology.

Their political beliefs.

As if I'm an idiot who can't remember you don't like to drive in bad neighborhoods, White racist code for the black neighborhoods.

You don't like to send your kids to schools that aren't White.

You don't like living next to people who don't attend your church.

Over and over and over again.

I'm tired of it.

This is a rant!

There are only so many times I can hear their bullshit in 63 years of living on this planet that Jesus loves me and died for my sins.

I get it!

I understand the story.

Please, please, please!

I don't need it repeated to me over and over as if I have no long-term memory.

I saw Old Yeller once.

Once!

I don't need to see it ever again.

Ever!

I get it.

I understand that you don't like the changes you see in the world.

I understand giving anyone the ability to make a decision for you who is not a White male land owner is an abomination sent from Satan.

I understand you don't like to share.

You don't see, you don't like to share.

But I see you don't like to share anything.

You want everyone to know how important you are.

How you are better than everyone else?

I know you think that it's true.

Believe me, I know you think you are granted a special dispensation to rule the world because you're White.

I can hear you.

I can hear you!

I can hear you!

Stop talking.

Listen…

Listen to what you sound like?

Listen to the venom.

Listen to the hate.

Listen to the driver in your life called anger.

Consider…

Instead of talking to me, start talking to yourself.

Start telling yourself you can be loved.

Start telling yourself you can be forgiven.

Start letting yourself just be.

Just be.

Let it go.

And then…

Come join us where the world is full of joy.

Peace

Daniel J Frey aka Toby

Changes

Since the beginning, humanity has used every ounce of strength in its imagination in wanting to believe that change doesn’t happen.

Cave paintings, scrolls, religion, books, plays, philosophy, photography, film, radio, TV, politics, and war all have espoused a belief that change shouldn’t and can’t happen.

Big problem, though…

The fundamental property of this universe we all live in is change.

Everything from galaxies to microbes all change.

Evolve.

Die.

Born.

So, anyone or anything trying to stop change from happening is on the losing side of the universe.

Not in touch with reality.

Trying to stop change from happening you just can’t win.

It’s called impossible.

Now, understandably, change is not always welcome.

None of us want to get old.

None of us want to lose the people, the things we love.

But their all going to change.

It’s human not to want things to change.

It’s fundamental to the origins of humanity to want things to be the same.

Repeatable.

Established.

Regular.

Predictable.

That way, we all can make plans and not have them ruined by a rainstorm stopping our picnic.

But… shit happens.

So, if you think about it, and it’s obvious not many people do, why do we invest our time, our money, our blood, sweat, and tears into ideas that try to prevent change?

Fear.

Fear is the spider at the center of the web.

Change represents unpredictable outcomes.

What if people are free?

What if people can marry who they want?

What if people can be who they are?

What if people want to be equal?

What if people want to be loved?

All these and more represent fear to a community and the individuals who do not want the rain to cancel their picnic.

Yeah, so it was okay to free black people from slavery as long as no one was inconvenienced.

It was all right to give women the right to vote because most women couldn’t be bothered.

It was fair to desegregate schools and communities because we weren’t going to fund those schools and communities after.

My point is that change, for better or worse, will continue to happen, but not as expected.

With change, there will always be outcomes that are not predictable.

That’s what change is.

That’s why I’m trying to get the attention of my conservative brothers and sisters and help them put into perspective their fear of change.

When gays got the right to marry, did frogs rain out of the sky?

When blacks got to vote, there were no more white elected officials, right?

When women entered the workforce, no man was ever hired again, correct?

No, none of those things happened.

Life went on.

When change happens, will things be different?

Yes, they will be different.

And that’s the beauty of change.

Where once there was a dead, dry seed, once planted, from that seed grows a tree under which the children and the children’s children of the planter will live, love, and know peace.

Life is a circle always turning.

Change is gonna come…

Peace

Daniel J. Frey aka Toby

We Help

What are you doing with your life?

Are you helping or causing problems?

You help.

A person is coming through the door, and you hold it open for them.

That man needs a meal you feed him.

That girl needs a new school book; you get it for her.

You help.

That woman is grieving; you sit and listen.

That young man needs a job; you hire them.

The old man at the store is lonely; you say hello.

You help.

If you're not helping, you're hurting.

If you're not lifting up, you're putting down.

If you're not caring, you're evil.

If you're not doing your best, it's a lifeless existence.

Life is about growing out of your comfortable shell and caring for those around you.

What does it take to make the blind see?

What does it take to make the deaf hear?

What does it take to make the heartless love?

The truth?

The truth means nothing to the selfish.

There is nothing any of us alone can do to make the stubborn, self-righteous, selfish person join the human race.

Nothing.

What we can do is join with the living, move forward to that bright community of love, and just in case…

We can keep that door open to freedom from fear.

Why?

Because history has shown that someday, in some way, the fearful, selfish person will open their minds and join us.

Until then…

We press forward.

We open doors.

We expand liberty, freedom, and justice for all.

We help.

Not just for those we love.

But also, more importantly, for those we don't know.

Love has no limit.

The only limit that can be put on love is in our hearts and minds.

Cut loose, be free, and see what is possible when you pursue Truth.

Peace

Daniel J. Frey aka Toby

Again Begin

Did you know I'm an artist?

I drew before I could write and I still draw down onto paper my observations, visions…

I draw upon my life and experience.

Being an asthmatic child and adult.

Of dying when I was seventeen.

I forgot my family and had to be reintroduced to them and the world.

Of being an orderly tending the sick, applying CPR on over 114 people, of caring for the dead.

Finding love, of losing it and finding it again, of the gift of a beautiful son and daughter…

To that end and a new beginning, I have begun a monthly extended graphic novel around the central drive of my life to help make the world better.

To point to an open door where our better angels wait for us all.

Again Begin is a journey to the central problem in the world the human race.

It has been a story I've worked on for the past 40 years.

Personal disasters, failures aside, I have turned over this story many times as I lay myself to sleep each night.

In light of the times, in the light of dim direction, plainly no light at all going on in some heads we give the title leader, I will bring to revelation this tale of science fiction wrapped around an ancient parable to stir our genetic memory.

A new myth…

Thank you, Joseph Campbell.

Below is a page exclusive to this website from issue number one of Again Begin available through all the outlets of ebooks as well as a printed version at Amazon.com

Peace

Daniel J Frey aka Toby

refugees, Daniel J Frey, Forces Film